Why Is Wedding Planning So Stressful?

Weddings look so shiny and pretty from the outside...

A bride-to-be drinking wine straight out of the bottle

But once you're knee-deep in the nitty gritty world of wedding planning, reality sets in. Your budget barely covers your venue, let alone your dream dress. You were hoping to keep things small and intimate, but the guest list spun out of control. Your sister’s not talking to you because you awarded the coveted Maid of Honor title to your bestie. Not to mention that all this stress is making you binge on chocolate and break out like a teenager.

The family drama… the social media storm… the trying to make everyone happy…

Cue. Meltdown.

Yes, wedding planning can be seriously stressful and downright complicated. But gather yourself together, because we’ve compiled the top 5 logistical reasons wedding planning is so dang difficult, along with some resources to make the process just a bit easier on you.

1. Where do I start? I’m freaking out here.

You're engaged. Congrats! Now…what the heck comes next? What should you do first? Who can you turn to?!

Don’t freak out!

We're here to help, and these articles are a great place to start:

Just Engaged? Great! Here Are The 5 Things You Need To Do First.
Your Wedding Planning Checklist :: Downloadable and Printable!
Don't have a year to plan? See our 90-Day Wedding Planning Checklist

2. Talking about money is so fun!

Yeah, just like getting the proverbial root canal. But you gotta have the conversation about your bottom line, because most weddings are stupid expensive.

If your parents or in-laws are making a financial contribution toward the wedding, you may need to make a few minor concessions when it comes to how that money is spent. But if you foot the bill entirely by yourselves, you risk not being able to afford the wedding of your dreams—or going into debt to get there. (Please don’t.)

Our advice is open communication, all around. Have an honest chat with the parties interested in contributing about the amount of involvement they expect to have, and have an honest chat with your fiancé about what you two can realistically afford.

Your homework? Read these articles on smart ways to spend (and save!) on your wedding:

3. Who ARE all these people??

And who would have thought putting a guest list together would be so complex? Well, part of the difficulty is that a wedding guest list is really several guest lists in one. You’ll want to invite your own friends, family, and colleagues…your fiancé will want to do the same…and your parents and any other contributors to your wedding fund may want to invite some of their friends as well. Add in tricky scenarios like Plus-Ones, B-Lists, and whether or not kids are welcome, and this task can just plain suck.

But keep this little nugget in mind: Being strategic about who you invite is the best way to cut down on wedding costs from the get-go.

For help with efficiently tackling your guest list, see:

4. Wow, my dream wedding venue costs…how much?!

Your venue is the determining factor for some pretty important things: your wedding date, how many guests you’re able to accommodate, and a large chunk of your budget for starters. Finding the right venue is a kind of a big deal.

Luckily, this is Here Comes The Guide’s specialty. We’ve researched thousands of wedding venues for you, and have packaged the information up in a pretty, easy-to-digest format. Plus, when you do find some venues you’re interested in, we prep you with questions to ask and tips to help you make an informed final decision.

We suggest you begin your venue search here:

Find Wedding Venues Near You—by budget, guest count, style, even setting!
Questions To Ask Your Wedding Venue
13 Affordable Wedding Venue Options (That Don't Feel Cheap)
10 Tips for Picking The Perfect Wedding Venue

5. Why did I think baking my own wedding cake was a good idea??

You know that old saying, “It takes a village”? It’s so true when it comes to wedding planning. You may think doing everything yourself will save money and hassle. You may even think it will be fun! But in reality, many DIY projects end up costing more time and money than if you had hired a seasoned professional to handle them in the first place. Plus, you’ll just end up totally frazzled with a mile-long to-do list a week before the big day. #notcool

Our advice? Simplify! Whether that means cutting out some décor elements (hint: no one will know) or hiring someone to do tasks for you, streamlining will help alleviate your stress.

Find the right wedding vendors for your needs and budget:

(TIP: Another great thing about hiring seasoned professionals to help? They’re experts at navigating tricky family dynamics. The right wedding coordinator can effortlessly convince your crazy uncle Ralph NOT to give an impromptu toast, and an experienced wedding photographer will time the family portraits just right so that your divorced parents don’t have to stand next to each other.)

And when wedding planning begins to weigh on you, here are a few things to help you stay focused on the big picture:

A newlywed couple walking hand-in-hand together

Aevitas Weddings

Let go of the idea that your wedding will be perfect. Because it won’t be. (There, we said it. Sorry if that was harsh.)
Your wedding is not a competition. It’s not a show. It’s about your partnership with this incredible person you want to spend the rest of your life with.
It’s easy to lose perspective amidst the drama... But at the end of the day, the number of hearts your centerpieces get on instagram won't guarantee a happy marriage. This one day won’t define your relationship, and you don’t have to enjoy the planning process.

Just keep the end goal in mind: you and your future spouse, happily ever after. The rest is icing on the {wedding} cake!

Wanna go from nitty-gritty to super pretty?

→ Get inspired by Real Weddings and check out our Wedding Ideas!

Filed under Expert Advice

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Some clients may have paid to be placed in our editorial and some of these links may be affiliate; however, we never include a venue, vendor, or product unless they have a proper place here. This is part of our Core Values. We create our website first and foremost to be good for the couples using it to plan their Big Day. We won't stray from that for a few advertising dollars. #scoutshonor

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