Ten Rules to Live By
Advice for brides while planning a wedding.
6. It’s OK to wear comfortable shoes under your long wedding gown.
Really, nobody will ever know if you wear flats. People will say your gait is remarkably relaxed and that you look radiant (who wouldn’t be radiant when her toes have been liberated from pointy pearl-encrusted torture devices?) You can always change into your stilettos for the garter ceremony, where tradition requires only a brief exposure of your shapely leg and prettily clad foot. Once the garter ritual is over, you can revert to your comfy footwear, having completely avoided any podiatric pain.
7. Be realistic—most men won’t care if your tablecloths are seafoam or sage.
With the exception of No. 4 (which only your fiancé would really care about anyway), try to remember that fussing over a wedding is mostly a girl thing. It’s not that guys don’t appreciate the effort or the symbolism, it’s just that they know they’re nowhere near as good at weddings as women are. If your husband-to-be really isn’t interested in becoming your planning assistant, don’t call off the wedding. After all, this may be the one time in your mate’s life when he’s willing to concede expertise to somebody who’s more qualified.
8. Never hire a wedding planner whose accent intimidates you.
Even worse, don’t hire one you can’t understand. Remember Martin Short’s heavily accented wedding planner in Father of the Bride? Nobody could quite figure out what he was saying and everyone was too cowed to ask. They gave him carte blanche and he did deliver a gorgeous wedding, but he also took the parents to the cleaners in the process.
So beware of relinquishing total control to the coordinator, or you might end up with just the trip to the cleaners.
9. Don’t write your own vows unless you’ve won a Pulitzer.
Millions of people spent hundreds of years reaching agreement on the “in sickness and in health” stuff. But, if you must boldly go where most women haven’t gone before, make sure you: 1) Don’t use “really, really, really” as a way of expressing intensity; 2) try not to say “I,” “me” or “my” more than 80 times as it will set off alarm bells in your groom’s mind; 3) keep the speech under 45 minutes because some guests will need a bathroom break after all that champagne.
10. This is about more than just you.
Marriage is a public celebration that involves you, the man you marry and both of your worlds. As much as your nearest and dearest care about the artfulness of your event, they care even more about having a meaningful experience. If you smile and roll gracefully with the punches on your Big Day, everyone will bask in your graciousness and go home savoring the lovely time they had.