Hard Questions Before You Say “I Do”
Posted by Meredith on Mar 17, 2008. Filed under Sex Romance Relationships
Comments (4), Permalink
At first, love is so easy. You meet a hot guy with a sense of humor who’s gainfully employed and treats you well…what’s not to love? And when you discover that you both agree that Obama should be President and football on Sundays is fun, you’re ready to say “I Do” right then and there. Super. Let’s get married. Easy peasy.
But it’s after this initial mushy phase when you find out a mutual affection for Peyton Manning won’t always bail you out. We all know that, before taking the plunge, you should talk through the big issues like sex (How often? How kinky? What if I’m tired?) and money (Joint accounts? Big screen TV? You do realize my bi-monthly haircuts cost $150, right?) This stuff seems obvious. And yet, I know so many people (including myself in my starter marriage) who just never take the time to really talk through the big stuff. And that, my friends, equals trouble, or worse, and not too far down the line.
A great starting point for those marriage-saving discussions is the book: The Hard Questions: 100 Essential Questions to Ask Before You Say “I Do” by Susan Piver.
Some of this is a bit toooo obvious, some is a bit cheesy, but, used correctly (and possibly covertly?) in a series of conversations with your Mr. Right, this little $8 investment could save you thousands of dollars and untold amounts of heartache. Plus, you just might learn some stuff about your guy that makes you love him even more. Love that.
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Comments
Super sage advice, Meredith. I’m so glad my hubbie and I sorted out the big questions prior. Although some of “the little things” I once that were cute do drive me to distraction nowadays (why DO men get turned on by a wife doing the dishes? Is it the rubber gloves? The soapy water? The rear view???)
No idea what it is, Jolene, but my husband is most interested in me when I’m wrist-deep in dishes, too! I wonder if Susan Piver’s book addresses that issue. Finding the answer would definitely be worth the $8…
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Some nice suggestions - I’m not looking to get married any time soon but you raised the right issues in a pre-marital conversation.